GFD logo
         Home   Log in   Get an account  
Privacy   FAQ   Contact   Chat live  
Stickers   GFD Store  

Stories Comments Both
general fucking fuckers from fuckersville
by egogg
gfd messages
(1337@clownpenis.fart) on Jun 7, 2005 12:38:17 AM

If you were logged in, you could vote for this story!

...and there fucktard friends. Don't you fucking know how to fucking pay attention?
That is my view of the current skiing/boarding community. When I was a young lad of 8 (lets see, that would be 13 years ago, goddamnit I am getting old) there was a certain thing called the fucking skiiers is a avery concise gathering of common sense...allow me to translate it...

1. Always stay in control, and be able to stop or avoid other people or objects.

(translation: Don't be a fucktard. There are other people who value their own lives on the damn hill, and fucktards have my permission to go out of bounds, See 6.)

2. People ahead of you have the right of way. It is your responsibility to avoid them.

(translation: See 1.)

3. You must not stop where you obstruct a trail, or are not visible from above.

(translation: This one gets me the worst. Last time I was home in Colorado, there were at least 5,000,000% more fucktard boarders than usual scattered on the hill like a damn plane crashed. Can't you fucking MOVE! FUCK! I nearly plowed four of the fuckers coming down one run, 'cause THEY SAT THERE FAT ASSES IN THE LANDING ZONE OF A HUE-JASS JUMP. WANT TO CATCH A SKI TIP TO THE EYE, FUCKER!?)

4. Whenever starting downhill or merging into a trail, look uphill and yield to others.

(translation: This happens on the road too, when people forget that OTHER FUCKING PEOPLE EXIST. LOOK. YES, YOU.)

5. Always use devices to help prevent runaway equipment.

(Translation: Duh. This is actually fairly closely followed, cause ignoring it might cause immediate monetary loss, which is basically the only thing people pay attention to, asshole (the addition of asshole is necessary to prevent the ending of the sentence in a preposition [to]).

6. Observe all posted signs and warnings. Keep off closed trails and out of closed areas.

(translation: snowboarders (some of them anyhow) have my permission to ignore this and RIDE THE FUCK OFF A TALL CLIFF)

7. Prior to using any lift, you must have the knowledge and ability to load, ride and unload safely.

(Translation: The bunny lift is there for a reason. Idiot fucktards.)

Since Boarding has gained in popularity, I have seen a sudden decline in my ability to avoid these fuckers on the hill. Maybe I should take a gun with me, and fire a few warning shots to clear the way.

[ Comment on this story ]

[ Comment on this story | Back to top ]