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general Did i do something wrong?
by americanxbeauty6
gfd messagesAIM
( on Sep 9, 2008 11:53:18 PM

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I try so hard to do the right thing, but in the end i still fucked up.
Seriously, I need someone to be honest with me.

I just don't understand. I will do absolutley ANYTHING for my boyfriend. Every day that I go to his house I fold his laundry and clean his room. I tell him I love him often and am usually the one to call him first and arrange/make plans. Yes, he does nice things for me too, but definitley not as much. After his 16 year old sister passed away last month I was there every day for him and his family, trying to hold myself and the whole family together. Not once did anyone ask if I was okay, only if he was and I accepted that since it is in fact his sister and she was only my friend. But now all he does is yell at me and get mad at me for no reason and condecends me all the time. I am sooo sick of it. I decided Im not gonna keep my mouth closed any more, which has caused enough problems already. I love him and we plan to get married and start a family, and now is a bad time to have doubts. Also, I get along well with all of his ex's (weird right?) so have only nice things to say about them. Except one. I hate her and I would laugh if she got hit by a bus and died. And he started talking to her behind my back and told me that he thought she was pretty. WTF. Why would you tell me that?!?! AND.. he is suddenly talking to like seven girls who are prettier than me on facebook. Fuck facebook.

I feel I am getting stepped on, and it is sooo hard to trust him. But I love him and he loves me. Is there anyway we can work this out? (Killing his ex is not an option unfortunatley) Or do you think he is just acting this way because of the recent change in his life?

[ Comment on this story ]

    You don't know what love is thumbs uppoop
    by kraken
    gfd messages
    on Sep 10, 2008 12:05:26 AM
    because that isn't it.
    [Reply to this comment]
    Can I ask a question? thumbs upheart
    by scarygermanguy(
    gfd messages
    on Sep 11, 2008 03:37:15 PM
    Do you have Welcome tattooed on your forehead, and are more of your kind sold in Pottery Barn catalogs?

    Cause you sound like a quality doormat to me.
    [Reply to this comment]
    Loose him...
    by canzus(
    gfd messages
    on Sep 12, 2008 07:25:52 PM
    He is not what you're after. The best thing in my wifes and my relationship
    is communication. We've been through a number of deaths in each others
    families, but we have the ability to talk about it. We've been married for
    twenty three years. Our talking through the good and bad times are what keep
    us together...

    [Reply to this comment]
    If you want to know if this is true love,
    by TheChisa(come@me.bro)
    gfd messages
    on Sep 14, 2008 04:28:29 AM
    tomorrow, do something unarguably heinous. For example, take a shit in his lunchbox.

    As he fumes up in rage over this transgression, take careful note of the expression on his face, and ask yourself if you want to look at that for fifty more years.

    If so, marry him.
    [Reply to this comment]
    You're obviously pretty young gold starheart
    by The Gaborg(Sidekick in my own life)
    gfd messages
    on Sep 15, 2008 07:15:32 AM
    I don't mean that as criticism; I was young once too, and it pretty much kicked ass if I remember well.

    I also remember being absolutely convinced I was in love and going to marry my girlfriend.
    All of them.
    Every single girl I dated seriously, I was going to marry. For real. I was 100% sure. Each time.

    What I'm trying to say is: love takes training, like every other human thing. Uncondicional love looks good on paper, sounds great in songs, and definitely sells tickets in a box office, but the kind of love that works better in real life is not unconditional. At all. If you feel you're getting less than you give, it's time for you to take a hard look at this relationship and decide if you really want this for the rest of you life.

    Tragedies are another thing that sells movie tickets a lot, but in real life, tragedies don't make people better. Tragedies wear people out, and bring out the worst and meanest in nearly everyone. Sometimes, when someone has gone through a painful experience, they just need some time alone.

    I'm not offering you solutions here. I'm just an older guy who remembers being young (and damn good looking..., shit!), loving a lot, losing a lot, and learning enough of it to know true love from self-inflicted bullshit.
    [Reply to this comment]
    by papaver
    gfd messages
    on Oct 19, 2008 08:11:50 PM
    you clean his room?

    [Reply to this comment]
    take my advice
    by johnson12
    gfd messages
    on Oct 21, 2008 07:03:40 PM
    If he is acting like this now and seems to be getting worse, I would think again about marrying him. It will not get any better when you are married and will be harder to leave. Trust me, I am speaking from experience. I am married with 2 beautiful daughters and my husband treats me like dirt. He gets worse as the years go by and we just put up with each other for the kids. They do not see how bad it is and it is awful that we cannot just be happy with each other. He does not think I am good enough for him. Really, think about it. You can change your situation and find someone who really loves you and will treat you with respect.
    [Reply to this comment]

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